Tuesday, April 17, 2012

A Moments Rest

Last night I was rocking Liam like I do most nights before we put him to bed, but instead of rocking in his rocking chair in his room, I sat with him on the sofa across the living room from daddy who was studying intently for his upcoming semester exams. It was quiet with just a little noise from the rain outside beating against our windows. Liam has always been afraid of thunder when it storms so I sat reassuring him like I always do, “It’s only God talking to you Liam, Can you hear? Don’t be afraid, mommies got you.” After a little while with this routine Liam finally starts to drop his eye lids and I sit quietly just watching him. I had missed him so much from his first night staying at Gigi’s house the previous night that I was content just to watch him.

As his eyes started to droop, stuck between half open and half closed I turned to my husband---who always insists I put Liam in his bed around this time and let him fall asleep on his own instead of rocking him--- and said, “You know why I love to rock him to sleep?” Not waiting for him to answer I look down at Liam and say, “It’s because I love to watch when he gets to this state, half asleep half awake, when his eyes are almost closed but he is still watching you…because his eyes don’t shake at that moment. They are completely still….They are never still…. It’s like he is..” I am interrupted by my husband who is now staring over at us on the sofa, “like he is finally at peace…finally resting… like the world finally stops moving for him for just a few minutes to give him some peace,” he finishes….my thoughts exactly. I nod in agreement with him and we both sit just staring at our sweet lovie.

That night, like every night, I prayed God would give him more of those moments where the world is still and his eyes are at rest to take it all in, and each night I’ll keep watching to catch a glimpse of his peaceful moments…believing one day they will be more than just fleeting moments between asleep and awake.

2 comments:

  1. My son was born with SOD and as a result had Nystagmus. His eyes at the age of two have become much less shaky then when he was 3 months and the questions about his eyesight began. This moment that you blogged about is precious and I'm hopeful for your family that you will experience much less fleeting moments as Liam grows.

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    1. Thanks so much for your comment Amber, I love hearing from moms of kids with Nystagmus because it always gives me hope to hear how much it slowed down for their child as they grew up. We are hopeful that this will also be the case with Liam as it was with your son. I don’t know much about your son’s condition but I am interested to know more. We are hoping to join with an organization to use this blog and other things to raise awareness for childhood blindness and vision impairments. I will google the video you mentioned and give it a go. Thanks for the advice and if you ever want to swap stories shoot me a message I love swapping stories with other “like” moms. -Amy

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